I looked up quotes about mothers and sons and found this lovely one, from Sophocles.
You’re not supposed to feel this way, are you? Your son shouldn’t be your anchor. You have friends, a career, an educational goal, you want to paint or sculpt…so says our society and our culture. It sounds fine but it isn’t true.
I think it must be a different kind of thing, between mothers and daughters. I don’t know why, it’s just an instinct. I grew up in the middle of a tight, warm, matriarchal clan and knew nothing of little or big brothers. But what’s the point of having a blog if you’re not honest? Michael is the anchor of my life. Even Peter tells me this. He’s not jealous of the link between Michael and me; he was a boy and had a mother of his own. It’s nice to be married to somebody as smart and selfless as he is.
In the delivery room, when I heard those words–It’s a boy–my life became complete. I had no idea what lay before me but now I had a son. Now I could relax and put the long labor I’d experienced behind me. Something clicked into place–the last piece of the puzzle of my life fit in perfectly.
When I looked at him I had the oddest thoughts and reactions. The first thought I had was “Oh, there you are!” We looked into each other’s eyes. Peter was crying as he watched this first bonding take place. Also, a thought came that Michael and I shared; and I have spent 30 years trying to put this into words. I didn’t feel all mushy and tearful; I felt like a football coach. There was this game called life and it was my job to teach him the rules, say something encouraging to him, then send him out onto the field.
From Michael’s birth until he turned five our family–the three of us–went through a few crises, mostly economical. Peter was self-employed; after almost two years of being a stay-at-home mom I had to get a job; Michael was put into full time day care at two years old; I hated all of this, everything, and I became ill. Fortunately, we didn’t drag on like this forever. Michael went into kindergarten–he had a full day–and I left the business world, thank heavens, and went to work with Peter in his mold shop.
Those times of being home all day with an infant, then a toddler, were not always pleasant. Often I cried from frustration because Michael was so restless. He was incapable of sitting and playing with toys for more than a few minutes. Of course I imagined the worst–that he had some kind of mental problem–but as some time passed we learned that he was blessed with what is called “an off-the-charts” IQ. He became bored quickly, “baby things” didn’t hold his interest. He wanted to be going places all the time. On rainy days, if I couldn’t take him out in a stroller, I’d put him in his baby seat, fold up the stroller and stick it in the back, then drive around. There was a shopping mall in the town of Exton, PA that had a huge space put aside for children to play. I was usually one of the first moms there on a rainy day. No wonder I could eat whatever I wanted and not gain weight!!! I was constantly moving. But although I cried because of the demands on me I wasn’t angry and resentful. I was a football coach and he was my anchor.
lgmwriting 