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I’ve written this many times but it fits the story. I learned in graduate school that in boys, the first signs of entering adolescence, i.e., having their own opinions, wanting to be more grown up, can display between the ages of 9 – 14. I only found this out in hindsight; practically the day Michael turned 9, he began to act and think like a young man. Kids’ stuff bored him, and he was quietly waiting to be counted among the adults.
We didn’t know, at the time, how bright he was. It just swept over us like a huge wave, how different he became. This was 1992 and Clinton was running for president that autumn. Also two of our local candidates were running for office. Peter brought Michael down to the Democratic headquarters in Media and Michael began to volunteer to do things for the campaign. He was always stuffing envelopes, running errands, answering the phone. He was swift, efficient, competent. The people quickly realized that they could actually depend on Michael to do real work–not just dumb stuff so he wouldn’t feel left out. After the election our family life went through a major change. Michael wasn’t equal but he wasn’t our child anymore.
I decided to deal with Michael as he was presenting himself and not combat him or try to rein him in. As long as he was doing the age-appropriate activities, I mean. So we let down the barrier and allowed him to share in our adult lives. Certainly not, again, anything inappropriate. But we were a heavy-duty, movie-watching family and we let him watch any movie that we would choose. This included all kinds of violence and bloodshed. How long can you protect your children from the world? Eventually it has to happen.
The three of us looked forward to the weekends. Friday night was pizza night and Saturday night was hot dog night. We had our movies all picked out and waiting for us.
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This whole wave of new changes began on one night, during the time Michael was nine and starting to grow up. We were watching some kind of BBC sitcom on tape–no DVDs yet–when something in one of the scenes exploded. It really was funny and we began to laugh. Then Michael said: “Can you run it back to the explosion?” We thought this was hysterical and a dialogue sprang up about “guy movies” and “girly movies.” Guy movies had cowboys, car chases, battles. Girly movies had love and relationships. I was outnumbered and we watched every guy movie we could find. Our favorite for a long time was “The Fugitive” with Tommy Lee Jones and Harrison Ford. Two major heavy weights, very, very little love stuff. A wonderful collision between a bus carrying convicts to a jail, and a train. EEEEYAH!! As my guys used to say: “Blowed ‘im up reeeeal good.” Very soon we knew whole sections of dialogue.
Here is another part of the story of those times. When the two of them went camping I told them I would load myself up with girly movies, which I did. But they were boring. I couldn’t believe it. All I cared about was blood, fighting, guns, and yes, explosions. I told them this when they returned from camping and they were justifiably proud of me, that I would admit this. I was just trying to be a good wife and mom.
We also loved Die Hard and Die Hard 2. We have a collection of Christmas movies that we watch every year and yes, both of them are included. Both take place on Christmas Eve…Bruce Willis was great, stabbing some guy in his eye with an icicle, tying a long hose around himself and jumping off a building, etc. Die Hard is one of my all time favorite movies because it has Alan Rickman as Hans Gruber, playing the evil genius. One of my favorite actors and still sad that he died. Finally, among many others, was Galaxy Quest, again with Alan Rickman–other than The Fugitive, one that sat at the top of our hit parade. Explosions, weird people from outer space, killing bad guys…what have I done to my poor defenseless son??
lgmwriting 